STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
