I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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