And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
