I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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