So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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