It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
