I am puke
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Randomize
