So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
