what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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