If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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