we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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