You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
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