i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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