he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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