there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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