Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize