tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize