whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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