He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
apparently the secret to your success is patron
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize
