Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Randomize
