i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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