in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
