In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
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