I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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