just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
