Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Randomize