idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Randomize
