I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Dicks are not precious.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize