I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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