she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
