Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize