that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Success! We fucked roommates!
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