'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
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