Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
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