The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
