I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize
