no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I think people are normalizing furries
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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