you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
