i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
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