it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
