I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
