I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
