I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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