well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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