i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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