i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
