No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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