Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
