Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Randomize
