I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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