awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
