Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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